From Anthony Robins "Awaken The Giant Within"
What have I learn't & to teach back?
I believe there are four basic ways in which people deal with emotion.
Which of these have you used today?
All of us wants to avoid painful emotions. So we try to stay from situations that made us feels those emotions & worse some of us refuse to feel at all. Though using avoidance will protect us short term, it keeps us from truly feelings which in turns doesn't help us to evolve as we should. And in the end, we can't avoid emotions.
A more powerful approach is to find the hidden, positive meaning in those emotions that we once thought as negative.
Denying that we are feeling certain emotions by telling ourselves lies; saying that it doesn't feels that bad but still inside we still questioning our very situations. Trying to pretend that nothing is wrong will only create more pain. By ignoring the message that our emotions tries to convey, it will intensifies until we have no other choice but to take notice.
We must learn to listen to our emotions clearly and use it for our own betterment.
Some people wear emotional badge by declaring their situations are worse than others, their emotions are much more serious than others.Instead of fighting or dealing with their painful emotions, they dwell in it. This is the deadliest trap because dwelling in painful emotions is like digging your own grave & in the end not only a person find its hard to get out, they might not want to get out at all. At that is clearly very destructive.
4. Learning & Using
The above three ways on how we deal with painful emotions must be overwrite by the fourth way which is learning & using. Painful emotions are signals that tells us that we should be doing somthing; a call to action.
If you want to make your life really work,you must make your emotions work for you.
Realize that the emotions you are feeling at this very moment are a gift, a guideline, a support system, a call to action.If you suppress your emotions and try to drive them out of your life, or magnify them & allow them to take over everything, then you're squandering on of life most precious resources.
You are the source of all your emotions;you are the one who creates them & you can feel any way you choose at any moment in time.